Motherhood wrings me…
some days less than others.
But always some wringing…
And the water gushes and drips,
Photo by Todd Baker
ALWAYS a constant falling of water…
The constantness of boy-wrestling, with inevitable injury…
The bacteria-laden dead frog found, boys dirt-covered and filthy, while making it a grave…
The melted-all-over cherry chapstick on the car’s dashboard, evidence of a little girl’s pursuit of lip loveliness…
Dry cereal spilled and flying ALL over the car, in an effort to jump over a sibling in his way…
Raid ant-spray soaking into travertine, in an effort to independently kill the ant-highway in our kitchen…
Toothpaste art in the sink of the guest bathroom, mounded and dried and abundant, in an effort of art expression and creativity…
Water spots all over the mirror, in the aftermath of water matchbox car races in the plugged and filled bowl of the bathroom sink…
Crumbles pouring out as I open my compact, momentos in the pursuit of 3-yr-old beauty…
Dust footprints on wood floors, evidence of fun outside without shoes, all the footprints christening a just-mopped floor…
Disputes over who sits where, who does what, and all the whys asked, in an effort to feel significant in their place…
The grumbling, and arguing, and rationalizing, all in an attempt to pave the way toward autonomy…
Dishes shattered, in an effort to responsibly fulfill chores, and work with contribution and significance…
And the opportunity to become more like Him…always my choice in the moment.
The moments presented OVER and OVER again, calling me to choose…
Will I give to the self-absorbed entitlement of the moment?
Will I run with the emotion so naturally occurring within me?
Will I cave to SELF…refusing the paths of compassion, and humility and patience…kindness, and gentleness and forgiveness…thankfulness, and joy, and self-control?
Galatians 5:22-25 But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law. Now those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit.
OR…will I lay my SELF down? Crucify my flesh?
Will I, with wisdom, tweeze the childish irresponsibility and sincere motivations, from their willful defiance and purposeful wrongdoing?
Will I identify and deny my auto-pilot reactions and my indulgences of spontaneous emotion?
Will I allow these moments a greater purpose in reflecting Christ in my response?…responses to them who He has entrusted to me for this short time?
Will I allow my heart in THESE moments, to be refined and remade into His likeness?
Oh and the wringing…always more wringing…
Me wrung of self-absorption, entitlement, and pride…Motherhood, an ultimate call to selflessness…Me, the first image of Him that they see. Them, more likely to follow my model as opposed to my words, my little ones watching what I choose in these moments…
This, a life long journey of laying down self….And looking to Him who first laid it ALL down…
God, THE One who was ultimately wrung…
Willingly wrung…in the giving of His only Son, our Lord Jesus, who was the ultimate sacrifice for the sin of ALL mankind…
Romans 5:8 But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us. 1 John 2:1-2 And if anyone sins, we have an Advocate with the Father, Jesus Christ the righteous; and He Himself is the propitiation for our sins; and not for ours only, but also for those of the whole world.
Him paying the ransom…
Him providing the pardon…
Him initiating, Him rescuing, Him redeeming…
ALL because of His GREAT love.
And I, when I choose in the midst of my wringing, to allow Him to do the wringing of me…the excision of self…surrendering to Him who makes me new, surrendering to His Spirit’s work that makes me like Him…
Well this wringing…THIS, is where a mother is made.
Psalm 16:1-2,5,7-11 Preserve me, O God, for I take refuge in You. I said to the LORD, “You are my Lord; I have no good besides You.” The LORD is the portion of my inheritance and my cup; You support my lot. I will bless the LORD who has counseled me; Indeed, my mind instructs me in the night. I have set the LORD continually before me; Because He is at my right hand, I will not be shaken. Therefore my heart is glad and my glory rejoices; My flesh also will dwell securely. For You will not abandon my soul to Sheol; Nor will You allow Your Holy One to undergo decay. You will make known to me the path of life; In Your presence is fullness of joy; In Your right hand there are pleasures forever.
May the drips of our wringing bring fullness of joy, as we surrender to His wringing work in us.
As you are being wrung, how are you surrendering to becoming more like Him?
Preserve those memories as you wring them into moments of love and joy.
Smile into their tender eyes and keep reminding them that they are loved. Isn’t that what our Father in Heaven does for us?
Ah, yes…and I’m looking into tender eyes EVEN NOW as we are cleaning up the shards of glass and blackberry jam from the floor…them sweetly trying to help make the peanut butter sandwiches. I am learning from the practice of Eucharisteo that surrendering to “weighing the moment down with full intention” with calmness and thanks, transforms from frustration to love and joy!
Ah, i love the picture you have painted here! and me, in the midst of the wringing! thank you for the encouragement. it’s Jesus. . . always Jesus, isn’t it?
YES…ALWAYS Jesus!!